Ways For White People to Cope With Getting Called Out
…Since you guys suck at it, and obviously need some pointers.
If we are friends, don’t expect me to soften up on you. My anger is real and I am not going to baby you. You do shitty things, you face the consequences because your actions do hurt me along with thousands of other POC who deal with the same shit on a daily basis. This literally saps my energy and I’m not going to choke down my words because you want your ego to be stroked.
I don’t care if your feelings get hurt. I don’t care. You are bringing harm to marginalized groups. If I call you out, I’m not attacking your person. I’m telling you why something you did is not cool and why you need to stop. If you try derailing the convo back to you and your feelings, get out. Don’t bother coming back until you’re damn ready to face up to your actions. Lots of us do shitty stuff. But we can’t spend forever moping about it. Pick yourself up and move on. Your self-pity is not helping POC, got it?
SELF-PITY IS NOT FIXING THE PROBLEM. ACCEPTING WHAT YOU DID WAS SHITTY IS. APOLOGIZING AND MAKING THE COMMITMENT TO NOT DO THAT EVER AGAIN IS. REALIZING IT ISN’T ALL ABOUT YOU IS. WE ARE NOT TRYING TO PURPOSEFULLY MAKE YOU FEEL BAD. BUT WE CAN’T STAND BY WHEN YOU SAY OR DO SOMETHING THAT DOES MAKE US FEEL BAD. WE AREN’T PULLING THIS SHIT OUT OF OUR ASS, SO STOP TRYING TO ARGUE THAT WE ARE THE ONES WHO ARE WRONG! STOP VICTIMIZING YOURSELF! BECAUSE THAT IS THE SHITTIEST THING YOU CAN DO!